American Idol Season 8, Jacksonville Auditions

How crazy was it last night to see a video clip of Randy Jackson's time in Journey! I wonder if that Kid 'n Play hair, pleather jacket featuring magenta and turquoise numbers (that looks like a cross between vintage Sesame Street garb and an infants' visual development toy), and those awkward moves would've gotten him through to the Hollywood round?...I'm thinking notsomuch. I just wasn't feelin' it, Dawg.

Randy's key phrase this season has been "bizarre." But mostly in regard to the judges. I rather liked the seating change last night, when Randy and Simon Cowell switched seats. The new 4th judge this year, Kara DioGuardi brings a refreshing view to the show, in my opinion. She seems to give Paula Abdul some support, gives Simon a run for his money, and gives some useful advice to the contestants...you know, when she's not crushing their hopes and dreams like when she noticed the one girl was voted "Most Humorous" in high school and assumed her audition HAD to be a joke...it wasn't. Awkwarrrrrrrd.

But it wasn't as awkward as the impromptu hand-over-mouth fake french kiss Paula planted on Kara for no apparent reason (I wonder what Kara's fiance from Maine thought of that?), or when Randy's SuperFan came in to sit on his lap, causing Paula to sit on Simon's, and Ryan Seacrest came in to keep Kara's lap company. All that love and they still refused the self-proclaimed Mariah Carey sound-a-like a trip to Hollywood.

Only 16 auditioners got the Golden Ticket to Hollywood from Jacksonville. Darin Darnell was not one of them. He gave a great pre-audition interview. He was bubbly and personable, working the room, making jokes, and speaking with other auditioners...I could've definitely pictured him on a future Ellen episode. Darin introduced us to his new friend Devin Cates who Darin thought was talented (I, on the other had was skeptical...I mean, the man was cuddled under a quilt with his mom in Jacksonville, Florida! Red flag, helloooooo), but when Devin was cut just before Darin went on, he crumbled into a teary mess. Darin couldn't compose himself in front of the judges when he sang Boyz II Men's "It's So Hard To Say Goodbye" (how fitting) and told them it's been a hard process. Upon dismissing Darin from the competition, Kara DioGuardi told him the music industry is paved with heartache, and if you can't take it in this room, then we just did you a huge solid. I'm sure he was very appreciative of their rejection. Not. I thought he was a kindhearted kid, until I stumbled across his 'I Love New York' profile and read he enjoys licking women's feet...Darin was rejected from that show, too. Shocker.

I didn't feel as bad when George Ramirez was denied a Golden Ticket. You remember him...the Jesus-looking Physics guy. As odd as I thought Simon's question to him was..."Where do you see yourself in 11 years?" (11? not 5 or 10? 11. Oooookay), it wasn't nearly as odd as George's reply that he "wants to have a simple house, with nice floors. I like marble." What the...?
Randy said George's audition was the quietest one he'd ever heard. Let's just say, quiet Physics guy BOMBED his audition, and isn't that what people always say in news interviews? "We never thought this would happen, he was always so quiet." Yeah, I'd be a little worried that he might have a meeting of the minds with Ross Plasvic, the other physics major, aka the camel who drank from Paula's straw. Just sayin' (and no that wasn't a threat...just like a skinhead from the deep south telling the judges to "be careful" isn't a threat, but it does make for good TV promos!).

I thought the best singer in Jacksonville was Ann Marie Boskovich, who came in kissing up to Kara, though she really didn't need to. She has a powerful voice, but the judges thought she was missing something...belief in herself as a star. They sent her away and asked her to reinvent herself and come back in. Ann Marie came back alright, with more makeup, "tossed hair," and less clothing and she was promptly put through to Hollywood. THERE's a great lesson for America's youth.

Only two more audition episodes remain this season, airing tonight and tomorrow night, then it's on to Hollywood. Salt Lake City looks like it will bring some entertaining auditioners tonight, including an Osmond, as rumor has it. Kelly Clarkson's "My Life Would Suck Without You" music video will be previewed during a commercial break, (and in full-length for 24 hours after the airing at http://www.kellyofficial.com/).

I personally am looking forward to seeing Simon Cowell hugged and lifted by a large man dressed in a pink bunny costume!! We all have our guilty little pleasures in life, don't we?