Friday, April 25, 2008

Bathroom Banter

CuriousGeorge has issues. Well, one issue in particular. He doesn't touch "it" when he's peeing. Frankly, he doesn't really have to. ;o) He just pulls his pants down far enough using one thumb, does a jiggle of one knee and is on his way. But, in the morning, when the 'ole morning wood pops up (ha!), the issue becomes mine. He starts the stream and then does this weird leaning back with his butt up in the air thing, trying to aim his shot from the open toilet cover to the water below. The boy won't touch it to push it down, and now I know why my bathroom smells like a men's subway bathroom. ick.

This morning I woke him up to jump in the bath with SpiderMonkey. He proceeded to shoot the cover, then leaned. I yelled to "Push it down!" "No Mom!" "CuriousGeorge, PUSH it down or sit down to pee. You're making a disgusting mess!" (stopping the waterworks to argue) "Mom, I don't have to!" "Evidently you do!" "Dad doesn't." "Bologna! All guys do. Most of them grab on like this (showing him, like I'M an expert, you know)." "(again) Dad doesn't." "Well then he uses his fingers to aim it and then gives it a shake like this (more charades, like I know! pssh.). Next time Dad's peeing, you ask if you can watch him do it (KingKongs's gonna looooove that!)."

Giving up on the conversation, CuriousGeorge gets in the tub, still sporting his, er, wood. "And don't you dare pee in that water, your brother's in there!" I could just see the golden shower happening now. After his bath, he approached the dripping throne. I saw him reaching to aim. He began and glanced at me to be sure he didn't have an audience (or to be sure that he did maybe). I peeked sideways through my long hair. He glanced up again, and I waited, and waited, and waited for him to finish.

CuriousGeorge (still peeing): *sigh* Geez! When is it going to end?!?

I was wondering the same thing!

5 comments:

Mandy said...

I haven't thought of that phase yet...ugh...when does THAT start???

Becky @ Boys Rule My Life said...

Cracking! Up!

I made Jeff let our oldest watch him pee, too! Now the middle boy watches our oldest and he's "starting" to get the picture about the toilet. I can't wait to have only one in diapers! However, that does mean I'll be cleaning the pee off the walls more often in the bathroom! :)

Great post... true to life! ;)

Kimbie said...

Oh thanks for the laugh this morning! I too had my husband "show" my son how to aim. I swear I think they enjoy peeing everywhere but the toilet..lol
Gotta love those little guys.

iheartchocolate said...

And here I was, SO looking forward to the end of DIAPERS. You have changed all that for me now.

justmylife said...

I have an 18 year old and I am still cleaning it off the walls! We have a rule, if it's stiff, you must sit! My 18 year old hates me! hehe!!! Mom accusing him of such, how embarrassing! I told him I could bring it up in front of his friends!